Trouble Sleeping- The Perishers

Trouble he will find you no matter where you go, oh oh
No matter if you're fast, no matter if you're slow, oh oh
The eye of the storm or the cry in the mourn, oh oh
You're fine for a while but you start to lose control

He's there in the dark, he's there in my heart
He waits in the wings, he's gotta play a part
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh!

Trouble is a friend but trouble is a foe, oh oh
And no matter what I feed him he always seems to grow, oh oh
He sees what I see and he knows what I know, oh oh
So don't forget as you ease on down the road

He's there in the dark, he's there in my heart
He waits in the wings, he's gotta play a part
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh

So don't be alarmed if he takes you by the arm
I won't let him win, but I'm a sucker for his charm
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh!

Oh how I hate the way he makes me feel
And how I try to make him leave, I try
Oh oh, I try!

He's there in the dark, he's there in my heart
He waits in the wings, he's gotta play a part
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh

So don't be alarmed if he takes you by the arm
I won't let him win, but I'm a sucker for his charm
Trouble is a friend, yeah trouble is a friend of mine, oh oh!

Ooo, oh ooo, ooo ahh

Rainiest Day of Summer- Elizabeth & the Catapult

Everyone's wearing jackets but me

Everyone's holding parasols, whistling

Everyone's wearing jackets but me

I'm feeling melancholy

Melancholy

Everyone's got a bicycle but me

Cruising down the avenue

Like feathers on the sea

Everyone's got a bicycle but me

It's all unsettling

Unsettling

But what is there to do

When you know that you've been fooled by the rainiest day of summer

Rainiest day of summer

Just when you decide

You wanna take a little step outside 

You get plummeted by the downpour

On the rainiest day of summer

Everyone's got the message but me

Rubber boots, and high tops, and skirts below the knee

Everyone's got the message but me

So why am I still laughing?

Why am I still laughing?

Cause it seems I found the evidence

That the weatherman lied

Maybe there's a side of us

That wants to be denied

But what is there to do

When you know that you've been fooled by the rainiest day of summer

Rainiest day of summer

Just when you decide

You wanna take a little step outside 

You get plummeted by the downpour

On the rainiest day of summer

Well, it's raining like crazy here, but luckily I have my handy dandy sunflower umbrella and well-used hoodie. Unlike my outer self though, my inner thoughts are being thrown around thanks to feeling like everyone is upset at me, including people I hold dear. I feel like such a Debbie Downer, but it's hard to see the silver lining to clouds when all they do is release heavy drops of self-doubt on your head. However, I'm starting to embrace the downpour and lift my head up to face it because otherwise, how else am I going to see the sun when it finally peeks through in the sky? It can't be dark and gloomy forever...

Dark Blue- Jack's Mannequin

I have (I have) you breathing down my neck (breathing down my neck)
I don't (don't know) what you could possibly expect under this condition so
I'll wait (I'll wait) for the ambulance to come (ambulance to come)
Pick us up off the floor
What did you possibly expect under this condition so

Slow down.. this night's a perfect shade of
Dark blue (dark blue)
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room when I'm here with you
I said the world could be burning (burning) down
Dark blue (dark blue)
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room well I'm here with you
I said the world could be burning 'til there's nothing but dark blue..
Just dark blue

This flood (this flood) is slowly rising up swallowing the ground
Beneath my feet, Tell me how anybody thinks under this condition so
I'll swim (I'll swim) as the water rises up, the sun is sinking down
And now all I can see are the planets in a row
Suggesting it's best that I slow down

This night's a perfect shade of
Dark blue (dark blue)
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room when I'm here with you
I said the world could be burning (burning) down
Dark blue (dark blue)
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room well I'm here with you
I said the world could be burning dark blue

We were boxing
We were boxing the stars
We were boxing (we were boxing)
You were swinging for Mars
And then the water reached the West Coast
And took the power lines (the power lines)
And it was me and you (this could last forever)
And the whole town under water
There was nothing we could do
It was dark blue

Dark blue (dark blue)
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room well I'm here with you
I said the world could be burning (burning) down
Dark blue
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room well I'm here with you
I said the world could be burning now there's nothing but dark blue

If you've ever been alone in the dark blue

If you've ever been alone you'll know (you'll know)

This week has just started and I'm already ready for it to be over. Actually, I'm ready for this year to be over already. Well, at least this semester. I wish I knew what the heck is going on. It's not fair to be put in a situation when you have no clue what the situation is and nobody plans on telling you. Maybe what I need to be learning from this situation is that a lot of people I come into contact with in this life will end up being only surface friends, even when I could have sworn there was meant to be more. And on the same note, the vice versa will happen. People you never expected to connect with will be those true friends that will be there for you whether you're in deep trouble, or all of it is just in your head. I'm finding out more and more who those people are, and though there might not be many, that's just making me appreciate them so much more...

Blue Lips- Regina Spektor

He stumbled into faith and thought
God, there is all there is
The pictures in his mind arose
And began to breathe
And all the gods and all the worlds
Began colliding on a backdrop of blue

Blue lips, blue veins

He took a step but then felt tired
He said I'll rest a little while
But when he tried to walk again
He wasn't a child
And all the people hurried fast, real fast
And no one ever smiled

Blue lips, blue veins
Blue, the color of our planet
From far, far away
Blue lips, blue veins
Blue, the color of our planet
From far, far away

He stumbled into faith and thought
God, there is all there is
The pictures in his mind arose
And began to breathe
And no one saw and no one heard
They just followed the lead
The pictures in his mind arose
And began to breathe

And no one saw
And no one heard they just followed the lead
The pictures in his mind awoke
And began to breed

They started off beneath an olive tree
And they chopped it down to make a picket fence
And marching along the railroad tracks
They smiled real wide for the camera lens
As they made it past the enemy lines
Just to become enslaved in the enemy lines

Blue lips, blue veins
Blue, the color of our planet
From far, far away
Blue lips, blue veins
Blue, the color of our planet
From far, far away

Blue, the most human color [x3]
Blue lips, blue veins
Blue, the color of our planet

From far, far away

I'm absolutely miserable. I can't be too far away from a tissue box (thanks to this cold), and my best friend left before I could even explain why I was so rude with her. I feel like this is a preview for the week coming up. That everything is about to go downhill. And that really scares me. I wish I had someone to turn to about this, but I always feel like I'm just burdening someone else with my silly problems, and I feel like Savannah is getting more and more tired of hearing about them. Ugh, I really hope today gets better. I just want to curl up in a ball and sleep for the next 40 days...

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun- Cyndi Lauper

I come home in the morning light
My mother says when you gonna live your life right
Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones
And girls they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have fun
The phone rings in the middle of the night
My father yells what you gonna do with your life
Oh daddy dear you know you're still number one
But girls they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have--

That's all they really want
Some fun
When the working day is done
Girls-- they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have fun

Some boys take a beautiful girl
And hide her away from the rest of the world
I want to be the one to walk in the sun
Oh girls they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have

That's all they really want
Some fun
When the working day is done
Girls--they want to have fun
Oh girls just want to have fun,
They want to have fun,

They want to have fun...

Well, today was filled with fabric shopping (even though I'm not creative in that way whatsoever), chimichanga eating, clothes, girl talk, and 50s music.  I'm still absolutely miserable from this cold, and I'm worried I'm getting short with the BFF because of it, but I can't help it. I'm just so tired and stressed about my test on Monday. Hopefully I can explain it to her in the morning when we all wake up...

Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)- Doris Day

When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother, what will I be
Will I be pretty, will I be rich
Here's what she said to me.

Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera
What will be, will be.

When I was young, I fell in love
I asked my sweetheart what lies ahead
Will we have rainbows, day after day
Here's what my sweetheart said.

Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera
What will be, will be.

Now I have children of my own
They ask their mother, what will I be
Will I be handsome, will I be rich
I tell them tenderly.

Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera

What will be, will be. 

Doris Day Singing

I haven't done super hot on my first set of tests, my best guy friend totally ditched me for his guy friends, and I'm battling a cold, but you know what? I'm still so freaking happy. I feel like nothing can tear me down, and that whatever will be, will be and for once, I'm great with that. I got to see my cousin that I haven't seen in what feels like months, which was so great. We're always able to pick up exactly where we left off and she's always there for me when I need an ear. I wish she lived closer sometimes, but I'm grateful that our relationship is back to being close again like it was when we were kids. and then my best friend is over for the weekend. I feel like this is going to be a good one...

One and Lonely- SuperChic[k]

It's not like they meant to hurt me 

Watchin TV, checkin Britney, televised, my guys 

Checkin out her thighs and I roll my eyes and sigh 

It's not like I even need to be competing with unreality TV, fantasy 

Not for a smart girl like me 

Some days it's hard to be a one girl revolution 

CHORUS: 

Sometimes I have good days and it's good to be me 

Sometimes I get the best of insecurity 

And it's quite alright to be the one and only 

But today I feel like the one and lonely 

It's not that I don't know beauty is only skin deep 

Just the skin I'm in, not the girl within 

But one imperfection takes away my grin 

Not that I think I'm ugly but 

Acne throws me for a backslide 

I won't go outside 

Makeup can't hide how I feel inside 

Some days it's hard to be a one girl revolution 

CHORUS 

(Oh, the one and lonely) 

We all have bad hair days 

Those nothing good about me days 

Just keep moving on cuz they'll be gone 

And we'll still be here going on 

We have our yesterdays 

No lunch cuz the jeans don't fit days 

Just keep moving on cuz they'll be gone 

And we'll still be here going on 

CHORUS: 

Sometimes I have bad days and it's hard to be me 

Sometimes I get brought down by insecurity 

And I have my days where I'm the one and lonely 

But today I choose to be the one and only 

Yea, I'm the one and only 

What a crazy-dramatic week. I don't know where I stand in some situations, but I do know that I still have a friendship that I was worried was about to disappear, and I realized that I don't need someone else to create my happiness. I need to depend on myself for that one. Hopefully I'll continue to remember that sentiment...

Introductions Need to be Made

So, I'm a gal with a "unique" name and even quirkier personality.
I. My name is Hilarion
   A. It's a family name, not some sort of thought up name by a set of druggie hippy parents.
      1. In fact, my parents are a nice Catholic couple who have been together for over 20 years despite the      whirlwind that is my brother and his chaotic personality.
         a. Oh, btw, I have a brother. He's cool when he's not making me want to chuck something at his head.
   B. Yes, it is a "hilarious" name.
      1. No, you are not original.
      2. In fact, if I wasn't a girl with a great sense of humor, I might actually feel the need to sharpen my sarcastic wit on your own lame overly-used name, Ashley, Michael, Joe, Brittany, and Lindsey.
         a. Actually, I really can't say much seeing as my own parents names are John and Joan (aren't those the male and female versions of each other? How much more common can you get?)
      3. What really matters of course is your personality.
         a. Too bad most of those names listed above tend to stick with their stereotypes.
           -Of course there are always exceptions to that ;)
   C. I've found that most of the other people with my name tend to be males.
      1. The majority of those are Asian
         a. My dad is convinced it's because the Catholic missionaries that were over in China at one point knew it wasn't common over here so they went a bit crazy baptizing the new converted kiddies with it.
       2. Which could make sense in theory since the original Hilarion WAS a saint.

Okay, I'm tired of writing in that format. I don't even write that way in my classes, so I don't know what made me feel like I needed to do that here, but it was fun while it lasted.

In fact, because I'm a bit tired, I'm just going to be really cool and post a list of my likes slash dislikes on here. It's kind of the gist of me, but not really seeing as I'm always adding and removing what I love and hate in my life thanks to this thing called "growing up" that we all are supposedly meant to do. In fact, it's probably changed quite a bit since I originally wrote it, but I'm a bit of a lazyholic, so I'm not going to update it:

I am a lover of music, humor, sarcasm, talking, Doris Day movies, God, family, friends, my animals, people who love me, softies at heart, old people, young people, a person who can dish it as well as they can take it, respect, self-respect, humility, witty conversations, klutziness, baked goods, fiction books that take me somewhere new, traveling, tacky sweaters, arts and crafts, baking, dark chocolate (chocolate in general), fruits and veggies, carnivorous behavior, peanut butter cups, happy beginnings, and life for all. I am a disliker of arrogance, mathematics, dense people, no sense of humor, pork cured in Spain, betrayal, insults disguised as joking, vegans (I'd be happy to be proven wrong on this one), Dots candy, gross flavored jelly beans, getting up super early if not necessary, sleeping in too late, dictator principals, self-consciousness, lack of conversation, always being politically correct, black licorice, feeling useless, paying too much for something, feeling sick from eating too much, people who think they know how to play a sport when they don't, Twilight fans (the ones who only picked up the book AFTER the shitty movies came out), Kristen Stewart, people who think the point of drinking alcohol is getting drunk, being told I'm wrong (especially when I know it), lack of life experience, and the phrase FML, even though sometimes I secretly say it in my head.

                I shall now leave you with a picture. Just because I can.